Learn Humility...
Learn Humility... ...The morning started very badly. I woke up, saw '8.14am' on my hp and immediately start to panic. Supposedly, lessons with mdm koh starts at 9am and I knew that unless I take a cab to school I would be late for certain. I was 'blessed' as I managed to get a cab pretty fast after I tidied up.
Upon reaching the lab a few minutes before 9am, to my horror, I saw that there was no one. A quick phonecall to Zai revealed my suspision - that lessons been changed to 10am. Feeling frustrated with myself (that I had wasted $7.10), I however made use of the one hour to grab some breakfast, past-year exam papers & a short revision of inorganic chemistry.
By 11am, I descended into another trough. Imagined doing tutorials diligently and then getting all of it wrong! Plus, I manage to get the first half of a extremely difficult question correct, only to see other people use it and finish off the entire question ahead of me.
current song choice: Ming Ming Hen Ai Ni by Ping Guan & Fish Leong
First thing first, I want to give thanks to God for although almost sliding into depression, I sort of regain my confidence before the inorganic chemistry quiz. It was great knowing that there are friends I can study and relax with. That one hour outside the lecture theatres was especially mood-lifting.
Second, I guess from the events of today that God wants me to learn humility. Confession: it does feels good that people think I'm smart when it comes to chemistry but God allowed me to see where I went wrong. Having all my answers wrong reminded me that I have much to learn and being cocky or a smart alec is definitely not the right way.
Moreover, I realised I had been arrogant too when I went around during the past week threatening to break people's arm. Sure, in a one to one fight if somebody throws a punch at me I can definitely defend myself. I may not have the ability to totally pull off the aikido techniques irimi nage or shiho nage but hurting somebody's arm would not be a problem at all. However, I know that what I had been doing is wrong. Today was only a small improvement as I did still mentioned "I'll break your arm" a few times. Pray that I'll continue to watch myself and improve on this.
Also, I've started reading A Sufficient Grace by J.Oswald Sanders. It's a third edition, with the first called A Spiritual Clinic and the second, Spiritual Therapy. It deals with the problems of life that Christians also have to handle, such as financial, stress and spiritual warfare. And how apt, that the first chapter deals with depression and despondency (means a loss of hope). Pray that from this book, I can furthur benefit in my spiritual growth.
posted by bert @ 11:37 PM
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