My timing for this year's Sundown pales in comparison to both last year's and the Standard Chartered Marathon back in December 2008 but I was still glad I ran the race and as with all full marathons, the exhilarating satisfaction at the finishing line still exists. Plus, I was not about to go push myself too hard again unless I want to start limping around for weeks and cringe at every staircase like last year.
Usually I would take on a race with my default running buddy Sherman a.k.a Frosty the Snowman but I hit the road yesterday night with Bun Bun instead because I realised she had nobody to run with. I took her through the first 21km where we had a great time catching up, joking around, oogling at the same eye candies, fantasizing about MacDonalds when we reached the East Coast leg of the race and really buying food at MacDonalds because we got hungry.
Sidetrack a little here, remember when Mdm Meha told Slutyuri that "you are ready when you can stop a man with just 1 look", guess what? I'm ready. Guy A was so engrossed looking at me when I walked past that he did not notice his partner passing him a drink (or perhaps he was just staring at my milkshake). Bun later commented, "he was saying 'sorry sorry' to his partner, jialat, I think they will have a fight when they go home later".
One of the things that I like most about this sport is that during the course of running itself, my mind is surprisingly clear to think and reflect about a lot of stuff. Hence, with the few hours I had to myself, after I left Bun behind with one of our friends Terence because I wanted to push ahead on my own for a better timing, I thought about some stuff and came to some decisions which I hope will eventually aid me in turning my life around for the better.
There had just been too much pressure lately, pressure from work, family, life and the non-existent all-time-favourite asking-for-it relationship (emphasis on the non-existent). Adrian once said this to me, "if a relationship cannot be a source of comfort and solace, then... ..."
In any case, hell week for me commenced with the start of Sundown. I am so not looking forward to the physically intense schedule ahead of CBT training, merchant vessel day and night climb, Simulation Centre Training (which is just as exhausting mentally), IPPT, overnight sailing and quartermaster duty. If I collapse before next Saturday, you guys know what happened. LOL!!
p.s. Running alongside thousands others, I saw a few couples, straight or otherwise, taking the challenge together. This happened to be one of the few things that I had envisioned would be present in my future relationship, (insert: Edwin's comment on my view of a perfect relationship). I am sorry, I think I have forgotten what I said to you and myself at the very beginning and yesterday night put me back into perspective. I'm but an imperfect soul with numerous flaws.
Having said that, when dusk falls and I eventually look towards the other end of the bridge in the setting sun, will I lay my eyes upon your silhouette, or the horizon??
posted by bert @ 9:47 PM
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